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NEWS | Oct. 28, 2009

‘Hitman’s’ on fire, makes it two in a row

By The Swami Football Guru

John "Hitman" Hearn asks Team Charleston, "Who's Your Daddy?" while standing alone at the top for the second consecutive week. 

John's 11-2 mark was equaled by Kenneth "Shockmeister" Shockley, Louis "Little General's" Class and Beth "Sea" Trout. Not only did the "Hitman" predict a Monday Night Football win for Philly, he nailed the exact score. It was nice for the "Super Swami" to watch this repeat, vested with the knowledge that some of my genius is finally starting to rub off on the contestants. 

This week saw the "St. Louie Clams" lose their 17th game in a row. You knew that coaching job was in trouble when the marching band formed a noose at half-time. The Colts, Broncos and Saints remain undefeated. The Swami's five-star pick of the week saw his beloved Steelers pin the first "L" on a tough "Vikes" squad. 

They say football is a game of inches and that's exactly how the Redskins moved the ball. The only way they can gain yardage is to run their game films backward. I thought one of the linemen had a tattoo on his leg, but it turned out to be a government meat inspection stamp. 

This week's "dunce cap cellar dweller" award goes to the usually reliable Oscar "O-Train" Thompson. Thompson's train departed the station way before his predictions. 

Now, without further delay I bring you my week nine, stone-cold, steel pipe-lock, fearless, sell the timeshare, five-star Daytime Emmy Award winning guaranteed predictions. 

Please e-mail your selections to 437mxs.swami@charleston.af.mil prior to the early game's kickoff. 

Sunday, Nov. 8 

Time (EST)    Visiting Team                    Home Team

1 p.m.              Washington Redskins     Atlanta Falcons
1 p.m.              Arizona Cardinals            Chicago Bears
1 p.m.              Baltimore Ravens            Cincinnati Bengals
1 p.m.              Houston Texans               Indianapolis Colts
1 p.m.              Kansas City Chiefs          Jacksonville Jaguars
1 p.m.              Miami Dolphins                New England Patriots
1 p.m.              Green Bay Packers         Tama Bay Buccaneers
4:05 p.m.        Carolina Panthers            New Orleans Saints
4:05 p.m.        Detroit Lions                      Seattle Seahawks
4:15 p.m.        San Diego Chargers        New York Giants
4:15 p.m.        Tennessee Titans            San Francisco 49ers
8:20 p.m.        Dallas Cowboys               Philadelphia Eagles

Monday, Nov. 9 

Time (EST)    Visiting Team                   Home Team
8:30 p.m.        Pittsburgh Steelers         Denver Broncos